It’s one of the most difficult decisions an adult faces – moving their elderly parent into a Winston-Salem assisted living facility. Many adult children dread even discussing the issue for fear of meeting with sharp resistance. So how do worried family members convince a resistant parent that moving into a long-term care facility is in their best interest?
Experts say the time to start mentioning “nursing home” and “assisted living” is now – no matter the age of your parent. Opening the lines of communication early helps to reduce the sting of those words later on. One of the best ways to address the issue is to make it your problem, not the parent’s. Instead of telling your elderly parent, “You have to do this,” say, “Mom, I’m concerned about you; it makes me worried to see you like this.”
Stella Henry, R.N., author of The Eldercare Handbook, (HarperCollins, 2006), says nine out of ten parents don’t want to be a burden to their children. That’s why sharing your concerns about your parent’s health and safety can make the difference. Experts recommend showing your parent that you are genuinely concerned for their welfare and will be their advocate. Another strategy is to ask the parent to “indulge” them by visiting a Winston-Salem assisted living facility. If you can make that visit before it becomes medically necessary, the parent may be more willing to make the move when the time comes.
If the parent still resists the idea of moving, the child should back off for the time being and look for another opening to raise the issue again. In the meantime, the child should enlist the aid of siblings, children, aunts and uncles to address an ailing loved one’s needs without the parent present. Everyone in the family needs to be on the same page when it comes to encouraging the parent to move. Otherwise, placement of the parent can become nearly impossible if even one disgruntled child resists the move. If your family has geographic barriers, the National Association of Senior Move Managers can provide experts to guide a family through the transition’s emotional and physical aspects.
Children often still feel guilty about moving elderly parents into a long-term care facility, even if the process goes smoothly. The important thing to remember is that the decision was made with the parent’s best interests in mind. It’s also one of the most loving acts a child can do for their loved one, since it improves the quality of the parent’s life from a medical and social perspective.
To learn about senior living alternatives available for your elderly parent, contact Vienna Village today at 336-945-5410, or visit us in person. We are happy to answer your questions about our community and be resource to you and your family.